Hangin' on Posco Pier!
For d-bags that can’t get it right…
KILLEEN, Texas — Officials at Fort Hood, Texas announced this week they have added the 78-year-old post to the list of III Corps off-limits establishments. With the publication of Commanding General’s Policy Letter #7, a policy memorandum signed by Lt. Gen. Robert P. White, Fort Hood soldiers were no longer authorized to visit the base….
FORT KNOX, Ky. — Your career manager is “emotionally” exhausted from screwing so many people today, sources report. Capt. Melanie Benford, who manages the careers of aviation captains, reportedly screwed over at least 20 different pilots before even eating lunch time on Monday morning. She started with a threesome: Capt. Andrew Adams and his field-artillery…
MAYPORT, Fl. — This year’s Jacksonville Military Appreciation Air Show in Florida, billed as the state’s biggest military air display, has been canceled over concerns over being way too fucking boring and not due to the coronavirus pandemic. The show, which usually draws more than 90,000 spectators, was scheduled for mid-July at Naval Station Mayport….
THE PENTAGON – The Air Force’s next generation stealth bomber, the B-21 Raider, is reportedly not only invisible to radar but also completely undetectable by budget oversight, according to sources at the Pentagon and Capitol Hill. “A conventional bomber would have a budget signature hundreds of times that of the Raider,” explained Northrup Grumman project…
FORT HOOD, Texas — Amid a heavy media spotlight on Texas Army base Fort Hood, senior leaders from the installation have decided to host country superstar Toby Keith for a concert The country singer is synonymous with love and support of the United States military. “What better way to shift the spotlight from the negative…
WASHINGTON — The United States emerged victorious after a grueling three-week war with foreign superpower Capitol Hill Occupied Protest (CHOP). The victory is especially momentous as it came just weeks before the 75th anniversary of the defeat of Japan in 1945, the military’s most recent victory. The conflict started when a six-block radius of Seattle…
NORFOLK, Va. — The Navy stands on the shoulders of great traditions, none greater than the ability to thrust its very essence into the hearts of the nation’s enemies, which may include (but is not limited to) other boats, docks, beaches, and, you know, stuff on the water. For one, it just sounds cool when…
SAN DIEGO — As a few military child care centers are starting to reopen during the pandemic, a strenuous and challenging PT test for your kids has been implemented for them to be accepted. With base officials issuing guidance for phased reopening of child development centers, supervisors have teamed up with Green Beret training personnel…
FORT CARSON, Colo. — Major Carl Vandemeer inadvertently awakened a Balrog this past Thursday, sources said, while delving into the 4th Infantry Division shared drive for an old product to reference. The Balrog, an ancient demon of flame and shadow, was found buried beneath dozens of nested subfolders, inside a file marked “old products.” Vandemeer,…
NEW YORK CITY SEWERS — The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles hosted a seminar on thriving in toxic environments for members of the armed forces this week. “Cowabungahooah, dudes!” Team leader Leonardo greeted the group. “I hear a lot of you say you can’t thrive in toxic environments. Well, I’m here to tell you all the…