Nation’s best intelligence analysts assess this coronavirus thing may get bad
By Blondes Over Baghdad
JOINT BASE ANACOSTIA BOLLING — A gathering of the nation’s top intelligence analysts has come to the dire assessment that the Coronavirus might become serious, sources confirmed today.
“Going out on a limb with some risky predictive analysis, this Coronavirus outbreak we’re seeing could get bad,” said Nathan Loewy, a senior executive with the Defense Intelligence Agency. “Like….10,000 deaths bad.”
The gathering of the nation’s top analysts was set to determine the worst threats of 2022. Although some analysts had been tracking the Coronavirus portfolio previously, their reporting was classified.
“We’ve got our best analysts scraping open source information with powerful software. I don’t think it’s too early to start stockpiling horse dewormer and bleach.” Loewy said. “And between you and I, get a UV light.”