Drinking eight Rip Its a day could help you live longer, study by specialist with no teeth says

FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. — An intensive 10 year study completed by a U.S. Army soldier with pus-filled abscesses where his teeth used to be suggests that drinking in excess of eight Rip-Its per day may help humans live longer, sources confirmed today. Spc. Brett Luers, who was both the subject and administrator of the study, […]