Hangin' on Posco Pier!
For d-bags that can’t get it right…
WASHINGTON — The Department of Veterans Affairs will introduce reverse disability ratings in an effort to address its perennial budget shortfalls, sources confirmed today. Beginning in 2026, the VA will assign negative disability ratings to veterans, charging them for any physical or mental health “improvements” resulting from their service. Share Officials say veterans will be […]
RAMSTEIN AIR BASE, GERMANY — As World War III came to an end recently with no clear victor, the one constant throughout the entire fight was the C-5 Galaxy sitting on the ramp at Ramstein Air Base. What started as a hydraulic leak led to an overhaul of the hydraulic lines throughout the aircraft, spanning […]
WASHINGTON — As the nation gears up for its annual fiery tribute to independence, the Department of Defense is urging a moment of somber reflection for a unique demographic of American heroes: those who, through a confluence of patriotism and questionable judgment, sacrificed their limbs during last year’s Fourth of July celebrations. Share A new […]
WASHINGTON — Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth announced earlier this week that the USNS Harvey Milk (T-AO-206) will be renamed USNS James Earl Ray, but after a different individual with the same name. Share “This ship will honor someone significantly less gay,” Hegseth said in a video message from his office, sipping sweet tea with […]
LOS ANGELES — The ongoing military presence in downtown Los Angeles has claimed its first casualty. Gambit, a Marine Corps working dog, was shot and killed during a visit by Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem, who allegedly feared for her safety. Share Witnesses say the 55-pound Belgian Malinois was leashed and fully compliant when […]
GRANDMA’S HOUSE, USA — Multiple sources report that your grandmother is very worried about “all this Middle East business” and just wants to know if you were on one of those airplanes that recently bombed Iran. Share “She’s been worried sick,” said your mother, even though you are not a pilot or mission commander, and […]
THE PENTAGON — As tensions between Israel and Iran continue to swell, the United States reaffirmed its unwavering commitment to regional stability by launching a full-scale invasion of Iraq, sources confirmed today. Initially framed as a “measured response” to both Israel’s and Iran’s escalatory behavior, the operation took an unexpected turn when someone reminded Defense […]
WASHINGTON — One week after the United States Army marked its 250th birthday with pageantry, pyrotechnics, and more PowerPoint than any rational force should endure, a surprising historical revelation emerged from the archives: a previously unknown chapter from Baron Friedrich Von Steuben famed “Blue Book,” detailing a drill move known as “pimp stepping.” Share The […]
NAVAL STATION NORFOLK, Va. — After months of losing multi-million-dollar aircraft to the ocean — a known enemy of aviation — the U.S. Navy has completed retrofitting its F/A-18 Super Hornets to operate beneath the sea. “As of this week, Navy pilots can fly, float, or flail in any environment,” said a visibly relieved Adm. […]
THE PENTAGON — After a lukewarm performance at President Donald Trump’s birthday parade, Army brass gathered in the E-Ring for an after-action review and ultimately concluded that the “parade could have been an email,” sources confirmed today. “We’re catching heat for troops phoning it in,” said Army Secretary Daniel Driscoll, who anonymously leaked the meeting […]