Hangin' on Posco Pier!
On All Hollows Eve, October 31, 2024, the U.S. military held its 249th annual Sorting Cover ceremony to sort this year’s recruits into their respective branches. Young men and women of varying ages (but none older than 42) gathered together as Gen. Charles Q. Brown, Jr. brought out a patched, frayed, and dirty tricorn hat, […]
NEW YORK — Outrage erupted this week after a turbulent comedy set at Madison Square Garden left attendees, particularly military veterans, rattled in more ways than one. The event, part of former President Donald Trump’s weekend rally, quickly spiraled when a comedian took the stage and launched what has been widely referred to as a […]
MIRAMAR, Calif. — As the minute hand on the clock in the barracks duty hut ticked toward 0705, the muscles on Lance Corporal Jay Hulterman’s face tightened further. The door to the duty hut remained empty, meaning Hulterman’s duty relief was now a full five minutes late. “This is bad,” muttered Hulterman. “Really bad. I’m […]
WASHINGTON—As the U.S. Air Force continues to do more with less, the organization has implemented a new service commitment of 20 years for pilots, effective immediately. The dismal retention rate of pilots leaving the service for commercial airlines after hitting their 10-year active duty service commitment (ADSC) has caused the Air Force Personnel Center (AFPC) […]
FORT LEAVENWORTH, Kan. — Wargaming is a staple of professional military education courses across the Defense Department, and students at the Army Command and General Staff College (CGSC) are pretty excited about their wargame scenario for Academic Year 2025. “I thought maybe we’d play out a scenario for defending Taiwan or perhaps countering Russian aggression […]
FORT CAVAZOS, Texas — The “Great Place” is poised to get even greater following Cavalry Family Housing’s recent announcement that it will house fewer Cavalry families. “Things haven’t been going well for people living on Fort Cavazos and privatized housing, whether people are worried about being bludgeoned to death or being sexually assaulted in their own […]
ORLANDO, Fla — In a leak of information with dire implications for the nation’s security, a Roomba in the Associated Press headquarters drew a stark warning on the newsroom floor using a dropped ChapStick. The simple message: “Skynet Offline.” Skynet, a neural-net artificial intelligence system run by the Air Force, is the cornerstone of American […]
TAMPA, Fla. — As part of relief efforts for Hurricane Milton, a group of veterans is helping survivors with emergency meals by teaching them some time-honored, little-known, and somewhat controversial meal modification skills from the military. Share The “Rat-Fuck Rations” group, or RFR, organized by former Army Spc. Greg Downey teaches residents the bespoke skill of […]
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, Syria —Army Sgt. Matthew Butler is an Army Reservist from Virginia who is currently deployed to an undisclosed location in Syria in support of Operation Inherent Resolve. He recently learned his wife is apparently cheating on him when he saw her and his children appearing with a local Congressional candidate in a political […]
AREA 51, Nevada — Wars abroad and natural disasters at home are providing a target-rich environment for America’s most covert operatives. But aircrews with the 127th Chemtrail Squadron are frustrated their efforts are being ignored and instead being attributed to the Jews. “Look, when you work for the shadow government of the New World Order, […]