Hangin' on Posco Pier!
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump has intervened on behalf of three Fort Bragg soldiers who found themselves in trouble recently. Spc. Willis Kerstetter, Michael Mills, and Hector Tapia—each assigned to Alpha Company, 1st Battalion, 504th Infantry—arrived late for first formation Monday morning. First Sgt. Jimmie Owens assigned the soldiers a week of extra duty to […]
KABUL – Blackwater, now known as Academi, will shock you and your and terrorists alike with their kick-in two doors, get one door kicked-in free “doorbuster deal” available now through the weekend. The “Turkey Day Special,” has already resulted in 38 dead civilians in Istanbul and sanctions from the U.N. Security Council, but cost the […]
MOSUL, Iraq — A spokesman for Kurds in Syria and northern Iraq voiced some of the most fiercely anti-U.S. sentiments to date by condemning President Trump’s probable pre-Thanksgiving Turkey pardon. In the strongest terms heard since shouting into the wind for consistent allied support, the criticism came from Hogir Karwan of the Kurdistan Dance Party […]
Americans increasingly respect and revere our nation’s veterans, and after two decades of non-stop wars many veterans have returned the favor and moved on from military service to public service. With that in mind, here are Duffel Blog’s endorsements for the 2020 presidential primaries. Democratic Primary: Duffel Blog Endorses Tulsi Gabbard This year the Democratic […]
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — The Psychological Operations community has long been known to be sort of weird. They have reached a new high, though, after finally receiving approval from the Department of Defense to wear tin foil berets. The metallic new beret comes as a compromise between the Special Forces community and the Psychological Operations […]
Dick Scuttlebutt is Duffel Blog’s legal correspondent, and has degrees in both Legality and Legonomy from East Dickhole State University. Go Manticores! Disclaimer: Dick Scuttlebutt is not certified by any bars, especially not by Howl at the Moon in Destin, FL. Screw you, Terry. Now that our Commander in Chief is pardoning people for wild, […]
FORT BENNING, Ga. — In 1972, a crack admin unit was issued a letter of reprimand by a military court for a clerical error they didn’t commit. These men promptly escaped from a mountain of paperwork through some quick bureaucratic footwork. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as clerks of fortune. If you […]
WASHINGTON – The House Intelligence Committee called upon Col. Mustard to testify last Tuesday in the hearings related to President Donald Trump’s impeachment. Mustard, a career Army officer and combat veteran of both the Boer War and the Sudan Campaign, sat in on the now-famous July phone call between President Trump and Ukrainian President, Volodymyr […]
NORFOLK – The Coast Guard is reportedly crashing on the U.S. Navy’s couch while this month’s budget negotiations break down in Congress, as a continuing resolution barely staves off another 35-day-long government shutdown, sources confirm. The House of Representatives has passed a short-term measure to continue funding the government, but since another possible government shutdown […]
WASHINGTON — Impeachment fever is sweeping the nation and the military’s most vocal barracks lawyers are providing confident, baseless, and often unsolicited commentary on the House impeachment hearings in both traditional and social media outlets. “They got nothin on my boy Trump!” Spc. Nathan Sledge, esquire, tweeted to his twelve Twitter followers earlier this week. […]